Tuesday, September 29, 2009

Chairman Pepper's 9-point plan

Pepper's 9-point plan for a prosperous century. Pepper realizes these ideas are not all that original. But only a personality like Pepper has the fortitude, follow-through strategy and negotiating powers to complete this plan :

1) High-speed magnet monorail linking all major cities in North America. It shall be nicknamed the "C.A.T".
2) 70% rebates on all purchases of electric and fuel cell cars, to help end oil dependancy.
3) Residential solar electricity and windfarms hooked up to a super "alternative energy" grid.
4) Redistribution of income. New cap structures for CEO's and executives. Minimum wage raised to $15.00.
5) Free Wi-max in every major North American city.
6) Creation of natural healing centers for treatment of early-stage cancer and cancer-relapse kitties and humans . Patients are fed organic greens and high levels of known cancer-fighting supplements such as reishi and vitamin c and monitored. Gentle exercise. Stress management in a spa-like setting. Dogs are not admitted, it will freak out the cats. Dogs will be left to their own devices as usual.
7)Investments in nanotechnology but only to create materials that are bioidentical to materials already on Earth. No genetic fiddling with plants and such.
8) Cat Suffragette. Cats earn right to vote and employment... (haha if they want to).
9) Cats will be encouraged to teach their method of "purring" with humans, which boosts the immune system, fight disease, and promotes long life.

cat suffragette

2 comments:

  1. If the election wasn't over yet, I'd vote for Pepper as a running mate to Obama! I think he'd make a much better advisor than Biden.

    Pepper is a very intelligent and well-spoken feline.

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  2. Pepper did his Political Science B.A. at Princeton and Doctor of Economics Phd at Harvard.
    Here he had to overcome "catism", as the ratio of humans to cats at the schools were 3061 : 11.

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